Been there, bought the T shirt

Vanilla (va – ni ‘-la) [Sp. Fr. L. vagina, sheath] A form of fag who only indulges in the ordinary. Professes be up for it but can be difficult to bring to either 1. A state of erection. 2. Onto all fours for a “dogs Marriage”.

I had meant to write this piece when I came back from holiday [gay pride in Gran Canaria] but having just seen a review of “Fetish Shops” in BOYZ magazine I finaly got around to writing. The whole place was filled with vanilla queens sporting RoB of London T shirts. Not that I care too much what people have printed on their shirts, I mean, look at all the arch Tory public school types wearing Che Guevara shirts…
RoB of London are a well-known supplier of gay fetish gear. Now this is not your Ann Summers sort of old tat, this is the full on kind of kit. No edible G strings here. Well, maybe, not any more.
Many, many moons ago, I had got myself a set of PVC trousers and waistcoat made at RoB, and fukin expensive it was too! Since then I’ve stayed with the ready to wear stuff.
Now it seems, having been there, you can buy something as shite as the “ T shirt”.
I only discovered this, after [my version of] sweet-talking this lovely bit of rough for an hour or so. Trying to suss-out how, well, kinky, would be the simplest way of putting it, things would get, I was beginning to wonder if I was talking a different language but having ascertained that he was a Brit, I knew I wasn’t. Turns out he was as vanilla as Walls. Only thing he’d bought in RoB was the fukin T shirt. Thinking about it now, I suppose it’s only the same as tourists going to Harrods and buying a Mars Bar just to get the carrier bag!